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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29530374">sola fide</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/yareyareshii/pseuds/yareyareshii'>yareyareshii</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - College/University, F/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 18:00:38</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,165</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29530374</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/yareyareshii/pseuds/yareyareshii</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>when Struggling dreamers akaashi keiji and y/n l/n finally decides to let go of each other but still clings into each other, by faith alone, sola fide.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>sola fide</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>hEY HEY HEY lol. This is a short one shot that i made a year ago so pardon me if you ever don't like my writing style. Oh and before you guys even hate on me, the last lines were inspired by In another life by author lux. I wrote this right after a finished IAL so ig that's why i lowkey gave this story that hospital settings hahashhd.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I smiled happily as I took out of the oven the newly baked lasagna I've been working on for hours already.</p><p>It was my first time cooking something that hard and it was already a success.</p><p>I wonder what he'll think of my masterpiece. I'm pretty much sure that I successfully hid this secret so he'll be surprised.</p><p>Besides, we haven't seen each other in months. I'm sure that he'll be happy with whatever I'll give him, heck he might even finish it all even if I gave him a burnt cake.</p><p>He was always like that; thoughtful and caring. He was more 'feminine' like compared to my chaotic myself, but when it comes to cleaning or cooking, I was the only person in charge of that.</p><p>The guy can't even cook an egg without spilling its contents on the floor. I looked at the door when it suddenly opened, revealing his usual blank face.</p><p>"Keiji!" I called as I quickly removed my mittens and ran to his direction to welcome him. I smiled as I opened my arms and hugged him tightly, the smell of rubbing alcohol filling my nose.</p><p>He laid his arms on my waist as he hugged me back, placing his chin on the top of my head, making me smile softly at the sudden contact.</p><p>it felt refreshing and comforting at the same time.</p><p>"How's the patient you've been staying out late for?" i asked softly while tightening my arms around him. he hummed in reply as i tried to inhale his scent more.</p><p>with a last sniff, i let go of him as i held his hand, leading him to the kitchen where the food that i had made for the both of us was presented perfectly.</p><p>he smiled at me softly as i pushed him to his chair and grabbed the pitcher of water beside him. i went to my seat and placed the cold pitcher infront of me.</p><p>"Amazing!" his eyes sparkled as he laid his eyes on the lasagna i had been working on for hours. i was relieved, he often complains about how i cook but he always manages to eat all of it in one go.</p><p>"Eat it, it's your last meal anyways." i smiled once again as i grabbed his plate and placed a serving of the food. i placed the plate infront of him and grabbed the garlic bread beside me and started to eat it.</p><p>"... can you no-"</p><p>"stop. we both know where this conversation will go once again."</p><p>i took a sip of my water, trying not to look at him. we ate in silence, not the 'awkward' silent, it was more of a 'savoring the moment' silent.</p><p>he kept on refilling his plate with the things i've made as i randomly eat whatever my hand was able to hold first, both of us trying to somehow make time slower.</p><p>stop, make the time stop.</p><p>make everything stop, i beg you.</p><p>i stopped when the guy infront of me suddenly dropped his spoon, creating a loud 'clank', making me look at him.</p><p>his head was down, his soft bangs covering the most attractive feature i found attractive in him; his eyes.</p><p>I sighed softly before leaning in to brush away his bangs, my tears unexpectedly falling freely.</p><p>"Never ever let those bangs of yours cover those gorgeous eyes, and even if they did, brush it up. I won't be here anymore to do that." I sobbed out as I cupped his cheeks.</p><p>He wasn't crying, he was just silently staring at me intently. I gave him a soft smile. Maybe it was really time to believe<br/>
He has fallen out of love with me already.</p><p>But how could I? We've been together through thick and thin, heck we've also been engaged for almost a year. Who would've thought?</p><p>Why is reality this harsh? Have I done something bad as this to someone? Or is the world just a fucking sour grape?</p><p>"Can't you stay? I need you... I love you." He choked out, making me cry more. The way he hesitated saying that he loves me was a confirmation that he really did fell out of love with me.</p><p>"I love you too keiji, but I deserve better. I won't settle for less again, I won't settle for someone who's Inlove with the idea of being with me." I spatted out as I saw the hurt on his eyes.</p><p>I have to stay strong. I can't just love someone who's fallen out of love with me, I will just end up hurting myself more.</p><p>I love him, but I have to love me too. I have to choose myself for myself too.</p><p>I stood up upon seeing the time. It was already getting late and if I stay longer inside this room, then I wouldn't be able to leave.</p><p>I walked to the living room where my bags had been readied, keiji following me like a lost dog. I grabbed the handle of the suitcase as I lead it to the direction of the door.</p><p>I breathed out before turning around, meeting keiji's intense stare. He still looked as emotionless as he did earlier while I was sure I pretty much looked dead by now.</p><p>I let go of my suitcase before I wrapped my arms around him, one last time. I was sobbing once again as I tighten my arms around him.</p><p>I've already lost the one and only person who could understand me. The only person who's made me feel special. The only person who can make me from a nobody to a somebody.</p><p>The world is now once again the bland world I've once lived with. My head is hanging low once again, with nobody to tell me how precious I am.</p><p>"I'll see you soon on the ER, surgeon. Achieve your dreams as I also achieve mine." I cried as I placed my lips on the side of his, pouring out the love I've had for him.</p><p>I let go of him, staring at him one last time.</p><p>"I will come back for you, future cardiologist. As you can see, I'm not the best version of myself. you were right, you deserve better and I don't deserve someone like you. Wait for me while I become the best version of myself, until then I promise you that you'll be the only one in my heart...I know it's selfish for me to say this but.... please wait for me. I will find you."</p><p>I looked at him, nodding rapidly as I wipe away my tears. It was really goodbye and the future looks so bland, like it isn't even true.</p><p>I will wait for him to be the best version of himself, but for now I will be choosing myself.</p><p> </p><p>———</p><p>The young cardiologist stretched her limbs as she left the operating room. She has been operating for a straight 9 hours and she was tired.</p><p>It's not like this was the longest operation she had but it still made her tired. She removed her surgical mask, the cool air from the ac brushing by her face. She then removed her gown and disposed them immediately.</p><p>She then headed to the sink as she stepped on the handle, the water falling from the faucet immediately. She now began to run her hands with the soap the hospital provided.</p><p>She placed both her hands on her aching waist. She felt old, her body was aching and all she wanted was to sleep for hours and eat a lot of pasta.</p><p>It was her comfort food as she passed med school. The only thing that made her feel alive upon the endless studying.</p><p>"Ayo miss CS! a GS is looking for a potential assistant CS." Van, a general surgeon greeted the tired cardiologist who looked at him blankly.</p><p>"No." She stated before walking away.</p><p>"He's one of the youngest professors here you dumbass! He might give you credits that can get you to a bigger hospital or even make you a professor! He's respected and has achieved a lot because he's one of the board members, you see." The general surgeon added, making the cardiologist stop.</p><p>"What time?" She asked before looking back to the smiling surgeon. "Tomorrow at 4pm. Oh and just a reminder, don't fawn over him okay? He would definitely kick you out of this hospital." The surgeon mentioned as the cardiologist turned around and walked away.</p><p>Why would she fawn over another surgeon when she's waiting for a certain someone who had been hers before?</p><p>The next day, she woke up at 12pm. She felt alive for once because of how she was able to sleep for more than 8 hours, which was a miracle if you're a doctor.</p><p>It was Wednesday, October 21st. And exactly 7 years ago, she had left him and chose herself. She still wonders up to this day if he was still keeping his promise.</p><p>And even if he wasn't, she was keeping hers. She did not care, She only wanted him. She wanted him despite the pain he made her feel.</p><p>"Gah, was I seriously gonna get married at 21? What a nussiance if I did." The girl mumbled as she brushed her teeth.</p><p>She needed to look nice for the operation later if she wanted to be promoted.</p><p>The cardiologist walked out of the bathroom, looking refreshed, making her look younger than she looked like yesterday.</p><p>Of course she would look look old, she hasn't washed her hair for a month already. She was so busy about taking care of others and she lost track of herself since then.</p><p>This must've been the way he felt when he was around my age. How was he able to that? How was he able to take care of patients and his fiancé at the same time?</p><p>He must've felt tired too.</p><p>He must've felt this empty too.</p><p>If she was in his position, she would also fall out of love of him and focus solely on her dream and her patients.</p><p>She felt a lump on her throat.</p><p>She just realized it was very selfish of her to ask more of him when he was already struggling this bad.</p><p>'He must've also wanted to sleep all day while pampering only himself, yet me being the immature and toxic fiancé I was, nagged him endlessly.'</p><p>Now she felt embarrassed.</p><p>She felt ashamed of how she acted years ago.</p><p>He wasn't the one at fault.</p><p>It was her.</p><p>If she hadn't nagged him when he was trying to focus on himself for once and tried to be mature and understand him, he still might have been beside her.</p><p>They might still be together, reaching their dream together strengthening each other in times of doubt.</p><p>It was all her fault.</p><p>If only she hadn't been selfish.</p><p>Her phone then rang, revealing a text from van.</p><p>GS; van</p><p>"Oi miss CS, the prof is already waiting for you outside of your dorm room. I told him btw so don't be freaked out. Good luck, pls promote me when you become a professor🤞"</p><p>She sighed loudly. There was no use in crying over spilled milk, what was done, is done. There won't be anything that could change it.</p><p>She brushed her hair before looking at the mirror one last time and placed her coat on her shoulder. She wished that the surgeon wouldn't be awkward since she wasn't the type to spark a conversation.</p><p>She looked at the clock; it was still very early. There was still an hour left before the operation starts but why was the surgeon waiting out of her dorm?</p><p>'He must've been doubting me since I've only been an official cardiologist 2 years ago.' The cardiologist thought as she grumpily walked to her door.</p><p>She breathed heavily before opening the door. She must be very respectful, she can't mess this up.</p><p>Her heart stopped when she saw the familiar build infront of her. She slowly looked up teary-eyed, to meet the gaze of the guy that she had been waiting for years.</p><p>It felt surreal.</p><p>The day the both of them had been waiting for was finally here.</p><p>He finally found her, just when she was starting to doubt that he would.</p><p>"I found you." The male smiled softly as he gently pulled the female closer to him. The guy was happy, however for the female she was speechless.</p><p>She doesn't know what to feel; anger, happiness, sadness was painted on her face. She couldn't pinpoint what to express first, she was simply speechless.</p><p>However, despite her crucial reaction, she admits that she indeed is happy of the situation.</p><p>Too happy, so much happy.</p><p>She felt happier now compared to when she graduated.</p><p>Everything was now well and it is time to be finally in each other's arms once again.</p><p>They've found each other once again.</p><p>"Yes, you've found me."</p>
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